Brian and I are happy to be home with Addi and Matt. Although this trip was short, I think the mental and emotional exhaustion makes the distance harder. As much as we love and appreciate the support from family and friends, ultimately Matt is the only other person who understands what I’m feeling, and even that isn’t a guarantee every time.
It is hard to sit through doctors’ appointments and listen to everything the doctors are saying while trying to control Brian, but I do my best. Usually I leave the appointments kicking myself for forgetting to ask a certain question. Even when I write questions down beforehand, I still feel overwhelmed by the information and walk away planning to check Google for answers, which never ends well.
Now we sit in limbo. It will be at least a week before any results are back. Today I booked two tickets back to Philadelphia for the end of May. It pains me to buy two tickets when I know Brian will end up in my lap. I will miss Addi’s last day of school, but I know she will be well taken care of thanks to Grandma and Miss Jaclyn…and her daddy. 😉
As for today and every day over the next week, I will pray. I will pray for a positive test result. I will pray it will help us move forward.